When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

I can't piss with my shoes on.

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.