don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

Do somthing only you do

I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.