After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Only use the left earphone.

I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

read on youtube comments with too unlikes

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.