- Things You Think Only You Do

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

I don't read the terms of service.

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.