I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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make south park refferences every day

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

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Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.