I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

I lift my butt when I'm farting

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

Thinking your life is a movie...

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.