Try stick to something but fail in the end

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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i open the cuboard door tosee if theres anything to eat and if theres nothing there i close it and go to the fridge if theres nothing there i go back to the cuboard =)

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

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I'm not bad looking and I don't fall into the beautiful category either but I really feel good about the way I look

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I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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Vote up your own websites posts, to make them look more popular!

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.