Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.