Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

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When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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Sitting down in the shower

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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make south park refferences every day

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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I **** with no hands.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.