Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

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When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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Mayada stupid

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.