I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.