- Things You Think Only You Do

When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

I hold my breath in elevators

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.