i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

Run faster down hotel corridors.

accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

Stab myself on a daily basis

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

I chew my ice cream.

Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.