Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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Picking my nose.

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.