Justin Beiber is a woman

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

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Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.