I don't read the terms of service.

eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

test how many stares you can scale in one step

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.