When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

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When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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I hit the frig after sex

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.