eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

thumb_up thumb_down +33

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

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I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Save more than once on your favourite game.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.