Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

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Become self-conscious and wonder if you were making faces while day dreaming during the middle of class.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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I mean Diana Ross.

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.