cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

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I wonder if elections are rigged?

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.