I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

thumb_up thumb_down -50

trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

I rehearse arguments in my head.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

thumb_up thumb_down -56

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

thumb_up thumb_down -56

When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

thumb_up thumb_down -58

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

i masturbate with my feet

thumb_up thumb_down -62

I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

thumb_up thumb_down -64

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.