I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

Justin Beiber is a woman

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.