- Things You Think Only You Do

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

Smoking in the shower.

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.