When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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I think about other women when having sex

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.