Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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I have a phobia of incest

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

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When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.

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masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

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Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.