doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

I think Frozen is an overrated film

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

Only use the left earphone.

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

Believing in the kindness of strangers

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.