doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

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I think Frozen is an overrated film

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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Only use the left earphone.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.