Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

thumb_up thumb_down -36

in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

thumb_up thumb_down -76

I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

thumb_up thumb_down -96

when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

thumb_up thumb_down -122

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.