Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

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I hold my breath in elevators

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I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

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I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.