wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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fap

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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I scratch and sniff.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.