Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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I chew my ice cream.

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.