Justin Beiber is a woman

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

I talk to inanimate objects daily.

Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

fap

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.