When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

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Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.