Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

Only use the left earphone.

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

Sitting down in the shower

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.