Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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Only use the left earphone.

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

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while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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Sitting down in the shower

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Put my hands together the 'other' way

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.