masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.