I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

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Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.