Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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Make up a song to yourself.

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.