Sleep with pillow between legs

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.