(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

thumb_up thumb_down -73

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

thumb_up thumb_down -91

You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

thumb_up thumb_down -99

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

thumb_up thumb_down -103

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -131

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

thumb_up thumb_down -10

never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.