Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

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Put things in the front of the dishwasher 1st cause im to lazy to pull the whole thing out to put anything in the back or the right place.

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Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

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Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

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mindlessly touch my laptop or desktop PC's screen after having just used a tablet.

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I piss excellence, shit suppority and whip myself with greatness.

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Say you're not hungry at a friend's house when his/her parents offer you food, even though you're starving

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Start browsing a list of pics at the back, so I can see the order they were posted.

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When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

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fap

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Whenever we watch a movie or stupid educational film in school, I sleep.

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Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

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losing something in the house, looking for it and then for some reason if I can't find it, I look in all the same places again

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Sometimes I reflexively say "ouch" when I drop an inanimate object and I'm not even hurt.

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Constantly check your post on here to see if other people give it a response.

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing.

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Suck up stuff with the vacuum you know you shouldn't because your too lazy to pick it up.

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trying to look cool when you're driving past other cars.

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

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If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

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Typing what you want to put in a message, then deleting it because you daren't send it

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I type things i really want to say to people and then delete them straight away because im too chicken to say it.

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Put on different accents, ad talk to my self in the mirror.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.