masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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Throw mini celabration of clock says 11:11, 9:11 or anything ending in :00

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think your hitting your leg on a chair or desk, really someones foot

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Pronouncing 'garage' as 'grozhh'

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when on a bus, pretend to fail to see your acquaintances to get some rest and avoid boring conversations.

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get insulted when lazy people cheer you to work hard

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Has to cover up with a blanket, regardless of the temperature...

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Wiggle my foot befor u go sleep in bed!!??

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Typing what you want to put in a message, then deleting it because you daren't send it

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing.

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when something on the internet is loading really long i close all the other tabs so my computer can concentrate only on one thing and then i get annoyed because i have to open up all the tabs again

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when you bleed you suck your own blood

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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tries to beat the search from loading the results before Im done typing my search when using youtube for xbox 360

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from now on in gonna eat healthier! *seeing chocolate* hm... okay i'll make an exemption today but from TOMORROW on!!!

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I piss excellence, shit suppority and whip myself with greatness.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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im going to rape that girl

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Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

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Having a dream where I am in a sex Ed class and instead of looking at slides experiencing everything firsthand

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Live in a house my whole life and still not know what switch does which

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when you say something and they go what? so you repeat it and they still didn't hear but once you say "forget it" they suddenly understood you perfectly.

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whenever I lost a tooth my parents would while I slept they would sprinkle caster sugar on the window sill and make footprints in it (tiny footprints)

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when the teacher is asking the class something and i have no idea I'm looking at the paper in front of me, pretending to still making notes and thinking to myself 'don't take me, don't take me...'

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.