Breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

every bite i have of a sandwich, i need to have a sip of a flavored drink to "soften the bread and make it taste good".

thumb_up thumb_down -97

Sometimes I reflexively say "ouch" when I drop an inanimate object and I'm not even hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Wheneveri brush my teeth, I make a snarling face.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Going to a friends house for the weekend, coming home and checking the fridge/pantry for new foods.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

When its nighttime, you walk around the house with one of your small animals in your arms, like it can protect you from anything

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Think that the shirts and bras that the girl you like should have never ben invented for that one specific person

thumb_up thumb_down -86

I have to check my closet for monsters so they don't get me while I sleep

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

when the teacher is asking the class something and i have no idea I'm looking at the paper in front of me, pretending to still making notes and thinking to myself 'don't take me, don't take me...'

thumb_up thumb_down -73

RAPE CHILDREN

thumb_up thumb_down -101

When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When eating chips/cereal (out of the box)/any small snacks I put an even amount in my mouth and divide them evenly on each side of my mouth and chew them like that.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Having a dream where I am in a sex Ed class and instead of looking at slides experiencing everything firsthand

thumb_up thumb_down -85

Live in a house my whole life and still not know what switch does which

thumb_up thumb_down +34

When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whenever I leave a phone message, I feel like I'm leaving the last message I will every leave to my family in my life because I will somehow die soon. I've watched too much drama.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

when on a bus, pretend to fail to see your acquaintances to get some rest and avoid boring conversations.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Date your English paper so it looks like you did it earlier (rather than saving it for the last minute).

thumb_up thumb_down -94

Throw mini celabration of clock says 11:11, 9:11 or anything ending in :00

thumb_up thumb_down +29

At home stay on the toilet a few minutes after you finish your business

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.