When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing.

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I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

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Being from another country and always thinking in english.

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when I need to do a number 2 in a public toilet I put toilet paper in there first so my neighbours cant hear it.

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I piss excellence, shit suppority and whip myself with greatness.

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When in a room with a bunch of people, see the one person who's extremely cute and then get a random boner and think "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY"

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When I'm watching an episode of a show that I've seen before with a friend, I say a part that is coming up ahead and act like I guessed.

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When I go up the stairs, I always have to end on my right foot. If I have to, I will even hop on one foot on the last stair in order to land on it.

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Put things in the front of the dishwasher 1st cause im to lazy to pull the whole thing out to put anything in the back or the right place.

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When I am bored, usually in class, I simulate what I would do if the zombie apocalypse was occurring right now.

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when u see a blond, brown,black,or red head girl u think of a blond,brown,black or red head joke -Randi L.

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Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

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Put on different accents, ad talk to my self in the mirror.

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Thinking that you're the only person on Earth, and everyone else is there just to affect you.

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you forget your phone when going to the bathroom, so you search for a shampoo bottle or anything to read or play with in reach.

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

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in my mind, traffic cones are called VLC.

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when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

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Start browsing a list of pics at the back, so I can see the order they were posted.

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Having leg bounce up and down for no reason at all.

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trying to look cool when you're driving past other cars.

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Blow dry my dick and balls after getting out of the shower.

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Playing TV in bed because if I don't I jump at every noise in the house and don't sleep.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.