I really like the day I was born even though there is nothing special about it like Dec 25 or May 20 (Christmas or Independence day)

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Not sure if im holding on to fart or shit

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clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

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Whenever I do something I want to tell someone about, I have to whisper it to myself before I tell them.

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i make loud noises so before i fart people cant hear it.

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I sometimes wonder what my past self would do differently if it knew what would be going on now

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I start doing some of the weird things I wouldn't have thought of doing if I hadn't I read them on this website.

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Two minutes after I text the person I like, I check the message to see what time I sent it and what time the person received it, and estimate that it takes the adverage person about a minute to respond and then another minute for you to receive it. so really, if the person likes you, it would take them about 3 minutes to respond. if its five, you automatically assume they hate you.

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I use my phone's auto-correct to make sure the words I'm writing are correct.

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Think of a bunch of "things you think only you do" after you leave the site

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One time I went to my old primary school and while I was there I needed the toilet. So I go use the schools and was shocked at how small everything was I guess because I haven't been there in a while

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

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When alone in a public restroom, after using the toilet I kick the lever and run away out of fear that it will splash on me.

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Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

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When ever a door is about to close I always try to put my hand between the door and stop it, but it gets to small and I get scared.

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Think of numbers as male or female.

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Whenever I order a lot of food at a fast food place for myself, I order an extra drink just so they think it's for two people.

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hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

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Show desktop when mom or dad walks in.

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i draw pictures of pokemon on comments (\____/) (??????)

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Whenever I'm doing my makeup I pretend I'm doing a makeup tutorial on Youtube.

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Fart and walk away from the stink area very quickly so nobody will know you made it.

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Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.