When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

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When making something I pretend I'm making a YouTube video of it and pretend I am getting lots of views

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Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

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While washing your hair in the shower, having the weird fear of opening your eyes to see something staring at you.

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One time I went to my old primary school and while I was there I needed the toilet. So I go use the schools and was shocked at how small everything was I guess because I haven't been there in a while

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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I'm starting to ignore Hollywood, the news and experts opinions more and more.

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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I used to do almost everything an even number of times because I thought that if I didn't something bad would happen.

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At night when alone in my bed...I sometimes pretend like I got hit by a car or something, and my loved one is there with me...and I act out my last words...and how I would act. I've done this occasionally since I was 5. With different scenario's. Schmee

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put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

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When your best friend has a certain make/model/color car, you start seeing it everywhere you go.

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Pee in the shower.

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

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I always cry when I pray.

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sit in the shower

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Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

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When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

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Download a new app, and say to myself I'll never stop playing it. Play it for 2 hours and forget about it.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

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Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

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Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.