Apply hand sanitizer after fapping.

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Laughing at a joke that you dont think is funny but everybody else does

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Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

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Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

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I have never disliked any video on YouTube with not many views ( no matter how bad it is ) because I feel bad for the uploader.

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Have to suddenly poop while shopping (mainly in Wal-Mart), but don't feel like traveling far to the restroom. So I kneel down in whatever aisle I'm in, casually shove my heel up my butt, and pick up some random item from the shelf and pretend to be interested in it. Finally, when the poop is secure in my butt, I'll put the item back and continue my shopping.

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smoke marijuana

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I used to do almost everything an even number of times because I thought that if I didn't something bad would happen.

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When i feel the back of my right hand starting to itch. in a few days, i get some money. When the back of my left hand itches.Some money goes.

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When people are whispering you think they are saying bad things

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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Thinking our singing voices are amazing, until we record it and play it back.

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sometimes I get so bored watching tv that I have an incredible urge to throw the remote at the tv. I would never do it, but I always fear I might and break the tv.

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

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I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

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never feel sad enough after being told a sad story

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While washing your hair in the shower, having the weird fear of opening your eyes to see something staring at you.

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put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

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hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

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When you're in your late teens, you blare the car stereo when driving near girls that are walking. When you grow up, you turn the radio down in fear that you look like a tool bag.

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When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

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Pee in the shower.

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Okay so probably like everyone else, when Schapelle Corby was found with drugs on her in bali I thought she was innocent but now since she was let out of the prison I am wondering if she did do it?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.