I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

Sometimes when you are looking down at a book or something you look up because you think you saw a person. Nope it was a tall lamp with a coat hung on it. Find youself periodically looking up every 5 minutes to make sure.

When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

Pee in the shower.

Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

When I'm at the checkout and paying with my card, I try to put my PIN in the card machine before the cashier has a chance to tell me to do it.

whenever there is a person I really, really hate, I imagion them dying in a cruel and painful way.

Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

Music is ALWAYS playing in my head. I can't go a day without noticing that the whole time a song is just burned in my brain, playing over and over. Is this okay? Im pretty sure im the only one...

Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

put an excessive amount of lead in your pencil

Whenever I read a book, in my head it all takes place at my own house, or some other familiar location.

When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

Wish that Mexicans would go ruin their own country instead of ruin ours.

I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

When my friends talk bout a show they ask did u see the one where they did this and I nod even thow I have no idea what they're talking about

See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

thinking that the 'writing comments procedure' on this website is extremely irritating.

when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.