Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Fart and walk away from the stink area very quickly so nobody will know you made it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

When I'm about to fart, I close my butthole with cupped hand to smell my own fart. Sometimes after I fart, I bend down just to smell the scent.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

whenever there is a person I really, really hate, I imagion them dying in a cruel and painful way.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When I'm reading a story in English class or a book in general but I'm tired while doing so and I'm reading on down the page, if I read a sentence and miss a word or mispronounce a word I MUST go back and re read the entire sentence until I have read it correctly or I feel very weird and panicked.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

When someone sits with crossed legs, I notice their lifted foot throb slightly with their pulse. It is really distracting sometimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

thumb_up thumb_down -68

I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Promise to save money then spends all of it anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

sometimes I get so bored watching tv that I have an incredible urge to throw the remote at the tv. I would never do it, but I always fear I might and break the tv.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

When you get lost while driving, the first thing you do is turn down the radio.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Thinking our singing voices are amazing, until we record it and play it back.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I really like the day I was born even though there is nothing special about it like Dec 25 or May 20 (Christmas or Independence day)

thumb_up thumb_down -42

being super bored at school

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I laugh easier when im with someone

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Look at restaurant signs and realize the font isnt as fancy as you once thought

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Constantly refreshing the Captcha for fear that It'll be wrong and I have to redo everything I did.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

thumb_up thumb_down -120

bounce when your tip toeing.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sitting next to a banana called James

thumb_up thumb_down -57

When out I like to "people watch."

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.