See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Sometimes when you are looking down at a book or something you look up because you think you saw a person. Nope it was a tall lamp with a coat hung on it. Find youself periodically looking up every 5 minutes to make sure.

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Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

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being super bored at school

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Spinning around to get dizzy, then spinning the other way to try and undo it.

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Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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I like to eat grilled cheese with ketchup

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When bored, I often fold pieces of paper to make a little point and poke my fingers/hands with it.

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

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get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

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When my friends talk bout a show they ask did u see the one where they did this and I nod even thow I have no idea what they're talking about

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

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Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

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I always have to google the name of this website, because I always put the words in the wrong consecution.

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After going to the bathroom, flush the toilet than hurry out of the bathroom and walk fast past a certain line going across the floor or make an imaginary line on the floor before the toilet fully flushes.

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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When winking, I feel as if I have to wink with the other eye to be fair to both eyes.

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When i play a video game and make some stupid noobish action including suiciding or playing in a lame way, i make sure that if somehow someone sees my screen, he/she notices why i do so.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.