Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

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Stalk boyfriend's facebook, go to everything he's commented on, and comment too.

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When you think you don't hear someone, but as soon as you say, "what?" and they start repeating it, you realize that you know what they had said. But then you don't want to be rude, so you let them finish.

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I eat ass

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masturbate quietly in my room.

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if someone posts something disgusting but true on this same site, rethink pressing the "thumbs up" button out of embaressment.

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when walking up to an automatic door, you sweep your hand towards to the door when it opens, you feel like the Force is with you.

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I flick through the channels on my TV really fast to try and make a complete sentence.

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Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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Totally piss myself off by thinking of future confrontations that probably won't happen.

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

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I put big spaces in between comments

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if someone i like or want to impress is around i change the song I'm listening to to something that i know they like or something not embarrassing, just in case they ask me what i'm listening to.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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wonder why the word "MORTGAGE" has a T in it?

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

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I make a conversation with myself when looking at mirrors !

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Realize you are dreaming and try to wake yourself up.

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hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

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I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.