imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

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when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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if someone posts something disgusting but true on this same site, rethink pressing the "thumbs up" button out of embaressment.

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Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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turn off the alarm clock one minute before its goes off when you wake up in the morning

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after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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Walking into the little door at the store that people put the carts though.

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Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you

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Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

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Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

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Hold your breath when you go in bridge tunnels and compete against your friends to see who can last longer.

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When I'm walking on the sidewalks, I make a game of how to walk on the pavement squares so I don't step on a line.

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Wish that Mexicans would go ruin their own country instead of ruin ours.

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Attempting to start phychic conversations with people in public

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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Walking past a light switch, but miss when try to turn the lights on so you just keep walking instead.

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look at old toys from when you were a kid and remember how they taste.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.