When a song comes on that i hate on the radio, i sing along with it because i know the lyrics. (Example: something by Justtin bieber D:)

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I randomly highlight stuff when I'm reading something, only to click outside of the text so I can actually read it.

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After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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When I have an argument with someone and they're correcting my grammar over a word that I obviously made up but they're grammar/slash spelling skills suck I want to end them.

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When I'm walking on the sidewalks, I make a game of how to walk on the pavement squares so I don't step on a line.

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Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

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getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

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you look at someone and they look toward you and you look away quickly then you look back to see if they are still looking.

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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Smelling your armpits to see if you smell and then disguising at as yawn/stretch

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Sometimes I forget that there are spiders in my bedroom, so after I've seen one I can't sleep for several days for fear that they'll eat me if I do. Then I forget about them again and thus the cycle starts.

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

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Having that feeling of entering the wrong classroom or bus, even though you know it is the right one.

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Giving my dog a massage.

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Your mom

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I am convinced that nobody had opened bacon or packets of ham with the flappy corner because it dosnt work!! So i get a knife and saw it out.

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I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

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whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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Hold your breath when you go in bridge tunnels and compete against your friends to see who can last longer.

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Take baths

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if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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Try to balance on and off on the light switch.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.