When a song comes on that i hate on the radio, i sing along with it because i know the lyrics. (Example: something by Justtin bieber D:)

I randomly highlight stuff when I'm reading something, only to click outside of the text so I can actually read it.

After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

When I have an argument with someone and they're correcting my grammar over a word that I obviously made up but they're grammar/slash spelling skills suck I want to end them.

When I'm walking on the sidewalks, I make a game of how to walk on the pavement squares so I don't step on a line.

Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

you look at someone and they look toward you and you look away quickly then you look back to see if they are still looking.

every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

Smelling your armpits to see if you smell and then disguising at as yawn/stretch

Sometimes I forget that there are spiders in my bedroom, so after I've seen one I can't sleep for several days for fear that they'll eat me if I do. Then I forget about them again and thus the cycle starts.

I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

Having that feeling of entering the wrong classroom or bus, even though you know it is the right one.

Giving my dog a massage.

Your mom

I am convinced that nobody had opened bacon or packets of ham with the flappy corner because it dosnt work!! So i get a knife and saw it out.

I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

Hold your breath when you go in bridge tunnels and compete against your friends to see who can last longer.

Take baths

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

Try to balance on and off on the light switch.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.