Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

I feel like I'm superman every time I run by the counter in the kitchen and the papers on it go flying off.

When alone in a public restroom, after using the toilet I kick the lever and run away out of fear that it will splash on me.

When it's 12:59 or 4:59 or something:59, I don't let myself blink/breathe until it's 1:00 or 5:00 or something:00. Anyone?

I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

I suck my shirt without realizing im doing it until people tell me.

when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

only feel the need to click one of the related sites that draws you after youve clicked 'next page'

When you drop something and then drop it again as soon as you start picking it up

choose which piece of cereal in the cereal bowl i should eat last.

dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.

Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

When I'm sleeping, I turn and my bed shakes, and I wake up thinking it's an earthquake.

When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

I can't stop watching ST:DS9, (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine) It's so awesome, but then I just, (the same thing happens with whatever T.V. show i watch) GET COMPLETELY OBSESSED with it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.