Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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Have to catch my significant other when they lie, not because I really care but to prove I'm smarter

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Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you

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Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

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Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

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For some reason I really love to be hated on horsehead network, no idea why, stopped questioning it moments ago... Moral: Know what I mean?

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Only I CAN TYPE FUCKlNG FUCKlNG FUCKlNG AS MANY FUCKlNG TIMES I FUCKlNG WANT! Moral the friendly r*pist: FUCKlNG COOL!

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i cannot watch horror films that have blood in it for fear of nightmares

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I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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Write a post and then find that someone else has already said it, but in a different way...wtf I'm really annoyed. And they have more likes too.

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When a room is dark and the light is really far away, I close my eyes to feel my way to the lamp.

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Read for hours... then hear a narrative for everything you do after you stop reading. for ex: "Jen gets out of the car, shutting it with a loud bang. She walks towards the house, noticing the dead squirrel in the road."

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While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

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Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

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Instead of scratching my balls with my hand I rub them vigorously on the bed

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When I remember something embarrassing I did or even something someone else did, I will yell random words. It started just with gasping but now I have like 5 words that I'll say randomly. It's evolved to include stressful or disturbing thoughts and not just embarrassing things. I have a pretty stressful life so I'm basically continuously making random sounds then looking around terrified that someone's heard.

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I rearrange books, movies, etc. in the correct alphabetical order in the fiction section of my public library, other people's houses, classrooms at school, etc. Sometimes this process takes a very long time.

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turn off the alarm clock one minute before its goes off when you wake up in the morning

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I talk to myself while playing games so I don't feel lonley!

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Touching your nipples at night wondering if anyone else wanted to touch them all day :)

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look at old toys from when you were a kid and remember how they taste.

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Walking past a light switch, but miss when try to turn the lights on so you just keep walking instead.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.