Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

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When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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Zoning out while looking at something and then trying to find the spot you were looking at when you're out of the zone but you can't find it.

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when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

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When you're having a discussion or an argument with someone and you are about to say something important then you completely forget what you were going to say.

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when I have an itch on my hand I scratch it with my stubble

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

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when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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When light goes off and cant see digital clock numbers when you are trying to sleep/wake up, i scream and get terrified because i think i got blind

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after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

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When I'm alone I occasionally like to give a little hump to the air. Not for sexual reasons or anything, just because it feels right.

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Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

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Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

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Cuss my ass off in the morning - jd

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.