Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

thumb_up thumb_down -85

open the fridge A eat food B think

thumb_up thumb_down -85

when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

thumb_up thumb_down -101

In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I somtimes think about what I would o if I had a wish and I go into a lot of detail about it in my head and then realize it will never actually happen

thumb_up thumb_down +16

See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Wondering who would cry at your funeral

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Thinking you can do parkour even when you cant and the have a friend over and try to show off

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When I am surfing the web and i go to another website i see an ad that was about something i just viewed from previous website I wonder if a little man is inside my pc keeping catalog of every website that i visit.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

thumb_up thumb_down -28

I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

When I'm reading a book and I come to a word that is long or difficult to pronounce every time I come to that word again I pronounce it 'manamanam'.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

When out I like to "people watch."

thumb_up thumb_down -50

I eat ass

thumb_up thumb_down -56

pull out a flies wings and let it go

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.