I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

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when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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When I'm alone I occasionally like to give a little hump to the air. Not for sexual reasons or anything, just because it feels right.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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Cuss my ass off in the morning - jd

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when my mum buys way too much of something I imagine were one of those 'doomsday preppers' families, with mounds of supplies in our basement.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.

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Sometimes I think that I'm a character in The Sims 3 and someone is controlling everything I do.

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I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

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Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

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misread dig bick

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When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

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I can't stop watching ST:DS9, (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine) It's so awesome, but then I just, (the same thing happens with whatever T.V. show i watch) GET COMPLETELY OBSESSED with it.

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think that you are wasting way too much time on this website and that you could be exercising right now or be doing a million more productive things than righting about doing more productive things on things you think only you do.

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I can't trill my R's

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I sometimes try to summon things with the force of my thoughts...I would be so useful...but no way, nothing ever moves.

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.