At the store then mom leaves to get something then u start panicking as the cashier begins paying and you thing she will charge yo already

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Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

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Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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I like to food shop between midnight and 5 am

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

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If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

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turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

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Sometimes I walk around my house with my eyes closed and pretend I'm blind.

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Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

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I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

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always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

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Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

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Sometimes I think that I'm a character in The Sims 3 and someone is controlling everything I do.

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I see some one I have a crush on in the hallway and I walk towards them and brush my arm against them and be like OMG I TOUCHED HER!

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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Spell Checktells me I spelt something wrong even though I am certain it's right.

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When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

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When reading something you have different voices for the characters/people.

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Getting really ticked off when Wikipedia tells you the ending of a book in the introduction. And the thing is that you don't even see it coming! Ex. My Sister's Keeper is about a family struggling with its own internal problems, especially with the oldest daughter having leukemia and the youngest is the only one who may or may not save her. *name* dies in the end. WTF?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.