Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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I often force my mind to think that i'm slowing down time at will just to feel awesome (like when walking down the street i try to make the all cars slow down).

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I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

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Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.

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While in the "try on" rooms of a clothing store, check myself out in the massive, wall mirror that's in there... and/or get nervous that someone is watching me.

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Feel all cool and look suspiciously at everybody else while leaving the theater after a good dramatic movie.

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whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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after a shower, try to shake the water off.

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When I'm riding in the car, I'll spot a tree, make it my goal and try to beat the car on the opposite side of the road to it. (Seriously I don't think anyone else does this!)

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Wonder why every single kid is looking at you in a restaurant.

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When reading something you have different voices for the characters/people.

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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I like to food shop between midnight and 5 am

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Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

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When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

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Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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I peel tiny strings off of cheese sticks because it's more fun and tastes better.

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.