I hate being called "buddy".

After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

sing like a pro in da shower

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Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

When I'm in the shower, I talk to myself, usually about my plans for video game procedures.

I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

Drink half the water in a water bottle and then swish it around pretending to drown little people inside it.

Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

Pick your dead skin then eat it.

When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.