I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

check shower for murder then pee

Thinking you can do parkour even when you cant and the have a friend over and try to show off

On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

Love the Twilight books, HATE the movies.

On YouTube , I try to find the clearest music

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

Not buying a product you might have otherwise been interested in simply because you think their TV ad is stupid.

Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

when you get a runny nose suddenly checks for blood oh good its clear

When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

Wonder why every single kid is looking at you in a restaurant.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.