Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

When ever my boyfriend doesn't reply to a text for a few hours I always imagine a worse case scenario and end up crying hystaricaly.

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

Wondering who would cry at your funeral

never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

After washing butt, turn my butt towards the shower and spread butt cheeks apart to wash the soap out of my crack.

When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

Search through the most popular section of this website trying to find my one

Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.