Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

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speak proper english

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collect kleenex boxes for the cool designs

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When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

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pick leaves of bushes while im walking and rip them up into small pieces

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I constantly get itches. On awkward parts of my body. In public places. And it's torture.

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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close one eye or the other to move an object near by when I'm bored -Noel

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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At times I get the annoying habbit of counting the notes on a song on my fingers, again and again until it ends with five, if not, I keep doing it until it does so as to not leave a finger left out of the melody.

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Pee in the shower

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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chewing icecream before you swallow it

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.