When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

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make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Wonder why every single kid is looking at you in a restaurant.

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When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

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YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

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I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

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Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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Boinked my neighbor

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wen on this website go look at the most disliked

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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In a meeting at work, you imagine throwing coffee into your boss's face, just to see what he would do.

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.