I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

Pick your dead skin then eat it.

skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

Thinking of a song to get an annoying one out of your head, then realizing that one's even worse.

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

play my ipod all night till my eyes hurt

Feel uncomfortable with the TV volume on an odd number

start planning Halloween costumes on November first.

If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

wonder if famous singers are actually the one that sings the song, or if someone else records it in the studio and then they lip sync at concerts.

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.