Wondering who would cry at your funeral

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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Hit the enter key really hard when finishing a long piece of text that you have just written.

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Go to the same website two days in a row and then never again after that

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thinking that everybody in the world (except me) has a device which shows them what i am doing, watching and makes them feel what i am feeling

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I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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Trace the letters on the front of your textbooks with your finger.

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When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

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When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

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When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

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Feel uncomfortable with the TV volume on an odd number

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Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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Questioning why they make the Captcha's(spamblocker) SO hard to read

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wonder if famous singers are actually the one that sings the song, or if someone else records it in the studio and then they lip sync at concerts.

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Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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never push to hard on the railing of a tall building, just in case its loose and you end up falling off.

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Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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I mute music videos and watch them to completely different music.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.