I Masturbate Daily.

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.don't like something because being scared that it appears on my wall.

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Only I CAN TYPE FUCKlNG FUCKlNG FUCKlNG AS MANY FUCKlNG TIMES I FUCKlNG WANT! Moral the friendly r*pist: FUCKlNG COOL!

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YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

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I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

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i noticed that a lot of people pronounce "LOL" like roll. Am i the only one that reads it as L. O. L. (el oh el) ????

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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creating your own personal perfect partner in romance or frendship, almost like a imaginary friend (but you don't speak to them out loud)

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.