Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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I hate being called "buddy".

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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wen on this website go look at the most disliked

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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After eating a banana I leave the last bit that was in the bottom

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.