Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

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i have my own way of eating every chocolate bar i eat, layer by layer

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

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I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

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google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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Think about breathing...

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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After eating a banana I leave the last bit that was in the bottom

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Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.