~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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do math problems in my head while having sex to keep from coming

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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I don't leave the toilet in a public restroom until the other person leaves, so I don't have to make awkward eye contact.

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

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Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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When Im going to sleep , I try to think of good things so I wont think of scary things

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

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When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.