- Things You Think Only You Do

My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

I masturbate with sandpaper

Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

collect kleenex boxes for the cool designs

Pretend animals talk to you!

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.