When Im going to sleep , I try to think of good things so I wont think of scary things

flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

always check thde back seat before starting the car

pull out a flies wings and let it go

When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

Pretend my life is a videogame.

Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

Think about breathing...

Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

I wonder why people were happy after the last election

Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.