think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

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When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

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Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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I masturbate with sandpaper

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fall asleep in the shower.

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Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.