Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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My brother (who is 2 years younger) and I have our own language, consisting of movie quotes and silly stuff we made up when we were little. We speak it with abandon when we're alone, and try as hard as we can to suppress it when we're with a friend. But sometimes some of it slips out, and the friend looks at us like he's the guy who isn't in on the joke; I always get the feeling he or she thinks the two of us are crazy. By the way, if you're the third person in company with two close siblings who are speaking their own secret language, don't ask them to explain or look at them like they're crazy. They're not nuts, and you won't understand, even if they try to explain. Just let it pass.

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

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When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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I never feel bored

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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I think about other women when having sex

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.