When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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pee when you are dreaming haha lol

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

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I pee in the shower. :3

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

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THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

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Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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I like to record the audio from TV shows and movies onto cassette tapes from my stereo, and listen to them on my Walkman while I'm working in the kitchen or around the house.

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.