Think about Facebook chats when your offline!? P.S Am I the only one, REALLY!

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Drink half the water in a water bottle and then swish it around pretending to drown little people inside it.

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

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Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

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I tell inanimate objects what to do.

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

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pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

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Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.