Think about Facebook chats when your offline!? P.S Am I the only one, REALLY!

Drink half the water in a water bottle and then swish it around pretending to drown little people inside it.

I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

I tell inanimate objects what to do.

Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.