- Things You Think Only You Do

If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

check shower for murder then pee

Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.