Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

Text random people saying I'm pregnant

Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

After eating a banana I leave the last bit that was in the bottom

When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

thinking that everybody in the world (except me) has a device which shows them what i am doing, watching and makes them feel what i am feeling

When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

Finally understand the meaning of a song i used to like as a child....... Im a Barbie girl in a Barbie world-Noel

When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

check shower for murder then pee

Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.