I tell inanimate objects what to do.

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I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

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~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.