Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

Text random people saying I'm pregnant

When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

check shower for murder then pee

When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.