When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

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spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

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I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

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when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.