Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

Use my phone to see what time it is

Stab myself on a daily basis

Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

pull out a flies wings and let it go

thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.