Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.