When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.