Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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i masturbate with my feet

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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Sitting down in the shower

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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Thinking your life is a movie...

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Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

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i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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I **** with no hands.

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When someone enters the room while i'm playing a game, start playing the best song of the game soundtrack so they notice it and think the game has a cool soundtrack.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.