I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

I never feel bored

Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.