I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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I no longer trust any of my local news because they appear to have an agenda

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when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.