Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

Text random people saying I'm pregnant

dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

I hit the frig after sex

Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

I never feel bored

I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.