Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

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After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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I piss in the bed every night

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Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.