Pretend i'm a sim.

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

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use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

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Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

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Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

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Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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I piss in the bed every night

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I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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When peeing at a urinal, move my stream back and forth the coat as much of the wall as I can.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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I never feel bored

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.